


Why Don't I Matter?

by LoveDrift



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
Genre: Despairing thoughts, Emotional Hurt, Lonliness, Need to be loved, Other, Sadness, Self-Harm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-08
Updated: 2015-02-08
Packaged: 2018-03-11 05:34:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3316085
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveDrift/pseuds/LoveDrift
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Drift is having a hard time. These are his thoughts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Why Don't I Matter?

**Author's Note:**

> I'm having a very, very bad....month? Year? Life? I'm fed up. Done. And this is the result.

Nice going, Drift. He did it again. Just keeps on screwing up. No matter how hard he tries, he always messes everything up. Good intentions that somehow turn out insulting, bad, wrong. When will he just stop? When will he learn that no one will ever take him seriously? He's a joke. And he doesn't even understand the punchline. One would think, given his history, that Drift would be a lot tougher... Stronger. Nope. He's as sensitive as they come. One little comment and he tumbles into a pit of despair. It don't take much to hurt his feelings these days. How pathetic. And now he's gonna start listing everything he sucks at, all the times he fragged up... Maybe..... 

 

Drift wipes at the tears that keep running down from his optics.

 

Maybe everyone was right, he is worthless and pathetic, nothing more than a wasted, useless guttermech , undeserving of anything and everything...anyone and everyone. They were right to beat him...use him. They new. They all knew... Nothing he does matters. Is it so bad to want love? To be cared about? Approval? Acknowledgement that he's doing good? He's so sick and tired of watching everyone else be happy and get everything they want. So sick of being ignored. Do they even know he exists? That he's here? They talk to you one minute pretending to be your friend...you open up a little and start to feel okay...come out of the careful shell you built around yourself and then BAM! They just...forget about you! And now all he wants is to lash out and slice them up into tiny pieces. Rip them apart. He never did fit in. They have their little clicks. He's always on the outside looking in. Primus he's stupid! What did he do wrong? He tried! He always tries! Why is he so hated? Don't they care how much he's hurting?! Is he really THAT bad?! He hurts so badly and no one cares. 

 

Drift looks down at the sword in his hand and slowly turns it round, inspecting it. He hurts. He pushes the point of the sword into his wrist joint and twists, welcoming the pain. He hurts so bad. He twists again and opens a small energon line, groaning in a mix of relief and pleasure as his energon leaks out. He watches as the energon coats his hand and drip, drip, drips onto the floor.

 

Finally...


End file.
